The author, not pictured, couldn’t decide which college to go to. Yana Paskova/Getty Images
- I was accepted into Duke, Columbia, and Yale, so I had to choose which one was right for me.
- Serious deliberation removed Columbia; it took a coin flip and following my gut to make up my mind.
- I’m a student at Yale, and I now realize my choice didn’t really matter all that much.
College application season is finally over, but the stress isn’t gone completely.
For many students, April is still a stressful time; you may still be debating which school to go attend. Sometimes, the college decision isn’t so clear-cut. For example, what do you do if you apply to multiple dream schools expecting to only get into one, and you’re lucky enough to get into multiple?
That was the case for me this time last year. As a kid, my dream school was Columbia, and for most of high school, it was Yale. At the last minute, Duke crept near the top spot. In the end, I was blessed enough to get into all three, and while it took some time, here’s what helped me decide.
Make sure to learn as much as possible about each school
Doing your homework before decision season is crucial. Visit colleges early to get a feel and plan what you could see yourself doing. Of course, you will change your mind over time, but getting a sense of your playing field is important.
Many schools offer fly-in programs to admits, and while they can make for a hectic schedule in April, attending these can give you a great sense of what the school is like. While Duke was initially below Yale on my list, attending their Black Student Alliance Invitational brought them way up.
At these programs, you get to see the schools, sit in on classes, check out clubs, and meet students. I met people at BSAI that I instantly connected and still do my best to keep up with.
Revisit what made you want to go to each school in the first place
Ok, so you’ve done your research, gone to the fly-ins, and are now trying to decide. First, ground yourself and check on the factors that are most important to you. While getting into great colleges can feel like the stars have aligned, it’s worthwhile to remind yourself of what led you to apply to each school in the first place and what you anticipated valuing before decisions came back.
For me, this meant looking very closely at financial aid and location. Being from a somewhat well-off family, I received substantial aid from Yale, Duke, and Columbia, but none offered me a full ride. All three schools were also situated in very different environments and were different sizes.
Both of these factors eliminated Columbia from my list. The aid package there was less substantial, and while I have loved New York for short periods, I couldn’t imagine living there, much less making the most of it.
However, after considering these hard factors, I was left with two equally good options. Duke and Yale gave me two different but incredibly enticing visions of my future. I couldn’t possibly choose myself; I was torn.
So, I flipped a coin.
Trust me, the coin flip works
I know it sounds stupid, but a coin flip is the best method for figuring out what school to go with if you’ve done everything you could but can’t decide. You shouldn’t follow through on what the coin flip says, but you should act like you will. Your reaction to the coin flip will tell you where you want to go.
In my case, it landed on Duke, and I felt unsettled. I planned on going to North Carolina after undergrad school anyway because my dream is to go to Duke Law on a Mordecai scholarship, so I wondered if Duke was right for my undergrad years, too. Yale was my dream school, and Duke’s emerging quad system was different from Yale’s residential college system, which I loved.
All these factors made me realize that I wanted to go to Yale. I committed before even going to Yale’s fly-in program, Bulldog Days.
After you pick, don’t dwell on it
Do I think about what would have happened if I had chosen Duke? Of course. But in the end, it doesn’t matter. Going to college is already an incredible privilege, and picking between multiple top-tier schools is an abundance of riches. There is no wrong answer.
In the end, it’s important to have confidence in yourself. I would still be Miles at Columbia or Duke. Sure, the environments would have molded me into a different version of myself, but in the end, I would still be Miles. That’s what matters.
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