I'm divorced and live in a 'mommune' with other single mothers - we live it up together when the kids are away

  • Divorced mother says that she lives in a ‘mommune’ with other single mothers 
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A woman has revealed how she moved into a ‘mommune’ with three other single mothers after getting a divorce.

Kristin Batykefer, from Florida,  was a well-known ‘van influencer’ with her ex-husband Will Watson, but the pair split up after she accused her former partner of cheating on her with a woman they had been travelling with.

After leaving her partner – who she had been in a relationship with for nine years – Kristin has developed a friendship with other single mothers and moved into a commune.

Posting to her TikTok channel under the handle @beachykefer, she introduced a video with the caption: ‘When it’s your weekend without the kids but you live in a mommune so this is how you spend it,’ followed by clips of her and other single mothers drinking and partying together.

One video, which saw the women dancing together in a crowd, was captioned: ”Concerts with the best dates’.

She also said the group have ‘movie nights’ and ‘home salon days’ as well as  ‘occasionally [pushing outside] our comfort zones by doing karaoke.’

‘Being a mom is a superpower and living in a house with three moms is super freaking powerful,’ she wrote, as she encouraged other single mothers to try the experience for themselves.

Reacting to her video, other TikTok users were intrigued by the concept of a ‘mommune’, with many appearing to keen to try it for themselves.

One user wrote: ‘Love this for you. I wish all of us single mommies had this much community’.

A second posted: ‘Oh my gosh. livin the damn dream. I’m jealous’.

Another envious reply read: ‘Like I need this so badly you have no idea’.

Meanwhile, a fourth quipped: ‘Sign me up for this! I just have to have the child first. Trying but it’s been a struggle but can I still be friends’.

i'm divorced and live in a 'mommune' with other single mothers - we live it up together when the kids are away

A divorced mother has revealed that she lives in a ‘mommune’ with other single mothers when she has a weekend without her children

i'm divorced and live in a 'mommune' with other single mothers - we live it up together when the kids are away

After leaving her partner – who she had been in a relationship with for nine years – Kristin has developed a friendship with other single mothers and moved into a commune

Kristin marriage fell apart in 2022, and she lost her job – leaving her with no income and nowhere to go.

Two friends took her, and her daughter who is now five, into their home near Jacksonville, Florida. Not long after Batykefer’s best friend Tessa Gilder went through a divorce and she also moved in with her two kids – now ages five and one.

Now 33-year-old Batykefer shares her ‘mommune’ life with her 50,000 followers – as the women pool resources to bring up their families.

i'm divorced and live in a 'mommune' with other single mothers - we live it up together when the kids are away

Kristin Batykefer (right) and Tessa Gilder (left) live in a mommune with their three children

In 2022, there were 10.9 million one-parent families with a child under 18 years old in the US, per the US Census Bureau.

Of these single-parent families, 80 per cent were headed by a mother.

Batykefer told The New York Times: ‘When I had to leave my husband, all I could think about was how I now had to figure out how to do everything on my own — buy a house on my own, pay my bills on my own, and raise my child on my own.

‘I never thought about finding another single mother to live with and do it together. We just fell into it. But now, it’s like, why isn’t it more common for us to join forces?’

Batykefer, whose divorce was finalized in February and now splits custody of her daughter with her ex-husband, is grateful that Gilder’s daughter is the same age so the kids always have someone to play with.

She uses her social media presence to document how the women split childcare responsibilities for the three children living in the house.

In a TikTok post,  Batykefer detailed how when she came down with an illness, the other three women in the house made her cookies from scratch and homemade vegetable soup, and took her kids to the park so she could rest and recuperate.

‘This is your sign to move into a mommune,’ she wrote.

She also gives advice to others, and encourages them to start their own so-called mommune.

In another video she said: ‘If you’re a single mom I would say find another single mom that you align with in values and then talk to her about it.’

Batykefer also shows the perks of living with other women – which mean she is able to visit the beach and go to concerts without worrying about the childcare responsibilities that come with single parenthood.

Batykefer and Gilder have also signed a deal with a television producer for a reality show.

They are currently living still in the four-bedroom home near Jacksonville, but hope to use any funds from the show to buy and remodel a fixer-upper of their own in the coming year.

i'm divorced and live in a 'mommune' with other single mothers - we live it up together when the kids are away

Batykefer uses social media to document how the women split childcare responsibilities

The women are not alone in their arrangement – and the set-up certainly isn’t a novel idea.

Mothers, particularly those in nonwhite communities, have been house-sharing for centuries.

But as many people experienced a restructuring of their living situation during the pandemic, a new light has been shed on households with non-traditional living structures.

Grace Bastidas, editor in chief of Parents.com, told The New York Times: ‘In Latino cultures, there’s this idea of a co-mother — a person who supports you and helps you raise your children.

‘At the height of the pandemic, we all started creating these pods of people, so this is just another iteration of that type of partnership.’

She continued: ‘We were told it takes a village, but it’s not always there, and single moms especially are juggling rising costs of living and reduced child care options.

‘This is part of the larger trend of parents stretching traditional boundaries of what a family is, and taking matters into their own hands to find creative solutions.’

Last year, Holly Harper, from Washington, D.C. detailed how she bought a four-unit apartment building with her friend Herrin Hopper after separating from her partner of 17 years in 2018 and selling their family home.

She said the the arrangement is a ‘kid paradise.’

i'm divorced and live in a 'mommune' with other single mothers - we live it up together when the kids are away

Batykefer now splits custody of her daughter with her ex-husband

i'm divorced and live in a 'mommune' with other single mothers - we live it up together when the kids are away

Batykefer’s divorce was finalized in February and she moved into a four-bedroom home with three other women

i'm divorced and live in a 'mommune' with other single mothers - we live it up together when the kids are away

Holly Harper detailed how she bought a home with her friend Herrin Hopper for their families

In an essay published by Insider she explained that she knew it would be impossible to find a duplex or condo in the area on her ‘self-employed, single-mom budget,’ but she wanted to own something as an investment.

‘To be able to do this, I found another single mom with the same needs as mine — space, comfort, a home — to live with,’ she wrote. ‘It’s been a life changer for not only us but also our children.’

Harper, who has one daughter, said she has always craved a familial community like the ones she’s seen on her favorite television programs. After her divorce, she ‘vowed to be open to unique opportunities’ — and, in this case, a unique living arrangement.

In a twist of fate, one of her closest friends not only separated from her husband around the same that she got divorced, but she also shared her ‘commune dream.’

However, they didn’t take the decision lightly. Harper explained that they approached the arrangement ‘like choosing a platonic spouse.’

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